My thoughts rush around my head like a disturbed ants nest, smashing into each other and treading heavily on my heart. The sadness of the silence keeps me craving for noise, a distraction from the truth. When all is good its very good but a moment of sadness breaks me like a piece of unloved china.
My children keep me from running away, they give me a sence of purpose. I look at them and feel overwhelmingly proud. My need for a family brought me to were i am now in my life. It was an unconvertional journey with some times too many regrets and resentments that kept me from flying as high as i could have.
My strength came from wanting to always do my best, my weakness was my lack of self worth. The two continuously battling against each other and creating a wall of self protection. Allowing no-0ne to see my true emotions and giving nothing away.
So how do i now find the strength to be gentle and soften? How do i learn to give and share, what i have always held on so tightly too? How do you learn to trust?
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This is deliciously profound and honest - thank you xx
ReplyDeleteWow sounds a bit familiar.. you will get there.
ReplyDeleteNot sure about the answer to the last question though
Good Luck xx